2 years ago today, from his hospital room, Jimmy devised a plan to get his family together for one last birthday surprise for me. I will never forget the feeling of him wanting to get out of the room (little did I know the reasoning); I was just so elated that he wanted to walk to the cafeteria. We sat down there for a little while (him on his pillow because he was so frail) and me right beside him- I had enough cushion, probably for both if us- I didn't need a pillow.
When he knew that his family was up in his rom awaiting our arrival, he said that he was ready to go back and we began our trek up to the 8th floor. when we arrived on the floor- he made me walk ahead of him because he 'didn't like people looking at him'. Well, of course I will run interference- I will kick their asses o=if they even THINK about eyeballing my boy!! We get to the room and he makes sure that I am there to open the door first..... "SUUUURRRRPRRRIIIISSSE!!!!!!!" they all scream.... "HOLY SHIT- are you guys trying to kill me?!?!" I asked. I will NEVER forget our last 'mom's' birthday together. These memories will always be cherished.
Though, I sometimes can't believe that this all ever happened- did I really have a son that passed . . . . yes, and it was just yesterday. . . or was it so many years ago that I can't remember. The feelings that one goes through in their life when death touches it is crazy. I am so afraid that one day I will TOTALLY crack and go off of the deep end to never return. I truly fear this.
The past few days I have been contemplating the meaning of life- what are we all doing here? There has to be a higher purpose than getting up in the morning, going to work, working all day, and then coming home to rest to do it all over again. I try to keep Jimmy alive in daily events. We talk openly about him and what he has done- and through us, what he will continue to do.
Today on my day off, I walk slowly through my empty silent house and have a very sad feeling as I look at his pictures.... I miss you so very damn much James Duane. . . . . . . . . . . . .
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Wednesday, September 11, 2013
Monday, September 2, 2013
Presents:
Cancer
On September 14, 2013, The American Cancer Society Relay for Life is presenting an all ages cancer benefit concert at the Chameleon Club in Lancaster, PA. The show is a culmination of six bands: Heroes 4 Ransom, Robbing Noll, Carving Out Fiction, Goodbye Four, Kill the Dead and TigerBomb. They are honored to take the stage in support of a great cause. Doors will open at 7pm and show tickets are $20 at www.chamleonclub.net or contact individual bands through facebook; raffle tickets will be available at the show for $5 a piece or 5 for $20. Raffle prizes range in value from $100 to $250 baskets, all donated by local businesses. All proceeds from ticket sales and raffle ticket sales will go directly to The American Cancer Society Relay for Life. The American Cancer Society is the nationwide, community-based, voluntary health organization dedicated to eliminating cancer as a major health problem by preventing cancer, saving lives, and diminishing suffering from cancer, through research, education, advocacy, and service.
The show is in honor of Jimmy Faus, who lost his courageous battle with cancer at the young age of 27 in the spring of 2012. An avid outdoor lover, artist and football fan, Jimmy completed a thru hike of the Appalachian Trail in 2010. He was a very kind soul with an unending desire to help people. Even during his own illness, his thoughts were on making sure his mother got her rest and ate at mealtimes while he was in the hospital. He was concerned that she had lost her husband to the same terrible disease only three years earlier and then faced losing her son as well. A loving son and brother, Jimmy left behind his parents, Troy Faus and Marie Faus-Crawford, and siblings, David Faus, Krista Faus-Brown and Shelley Faus. Marie Faus-Crawford has started the ‘Jimmy Faus Foundation’, which helps those in their time of need by hosting an annual bake sale in April.
During his stay in the hospital, Jimmy met Hutch, lead singer from Heroes 4 Ransom, and left him forever touched to help those like Jimmy. Hutch made a promise to Jimmy, who was unable to pursue alternative treatments for his disease due to cost, to raise money through a show to help those in need during their time of fighting to survive. He was unable to organize the show before Jimmy’s passing, but we hope that in his mother’s words, “I want him to smile down upon us and KNOW that through family and friends his helping hands are not yet still”.
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