Tuesday, July 31, 2012

I posted a very large entry- I think that by me adding the pictures, it pushed it off. I tried to copy and repost.... but I can't seem to do do that. Maybe I will contact Paul to see how we can repost it to bring it forward for others to see.
Thanks for reading.
Thanks Clare- wait until you SEE the tattoo in person. :)
I also should have added that the words on the tattoo are a random note that Jimmy had written to me and placed on the counter months ago. I kept that note and had it lamintaed and now it rides in my car with me everywhere. I am so glad that I had that note- how I feel to see the words daily in his hand writing is more than I can try to explain.

Monday, July 30, 2012

I guess I should give a little background on this tattoo. When Jimmy finally got around to (after the trail) getting his 'Jesus-type' hair style cut to his 'normal' cut, Jeff and he stopped and took Pics of his 'mullet' cut... it is PRICELESS!!! He also had on one of the shirts that I had purchased for him... it says... Don't pretend that you don't WANT SOME OF THIS. HAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaa.. Jimmy LOVED the shirts that I got him, he would BRAG to his co-workers that his MOM got them for him. I had one fella introduce himself to me and say "So you are the one that got him all of those T-Shirts?" I LOVE IT!! I was as proud of him as he was of me. He was so very special.

Great pics, right?!




Clare-
I am sooooo excited for this. I am just so priveledged to be part of the love and friendship. I KNOW Jeff loveS Jimmy very much and all of his actions show this on a consitant basis. I LOVE that Jimmy's wishes are being carried out. I also LOVE the idea of the website being placed on the barrel- what a GREAT IDEA. We will stay tuned to see what happens!! Thanks Clare - I love you!!
Last week was a good one. I had several GREAT moments. I decided to do a dessert social for everyone at GSV that helped me to spend the time I needed with Jimmy during our journey together; from employees donating their precious PTO to residents attending fundraisers to sending cards and saying prayers of healing and support. I spent the evening on Wednesday after work baking cakes and tarts. Thursday, Shelley came over (for a little while) and we baked LOTS of cookies, etc. I FELT Jimmy so strongly as I was baking- I can't explain the feeling, other than I felt a sense of love and pride- it felt as if he was giving his apporval of what I was doing. IT WAS AWESOME!! I even used a couple of recipes from a resident that passed away a few years ago. I want her to know that I am watching over her husband very carefully- He (Lloyd) loved that I honored her with using her recipes... that in itself was rewarding and special. (ps- the picture of the cheesecake tart was her recipe)
After all was done- I had baked 19 different types of yummy desserts for a VERY IMPORTANT thank you to a VERY IMPORTANT group of people. Friday, my girls (Krista and Shelley) along with my beautiful grandkids, (Damion and Zen) came to GSV to help me set up our wonderful dessert reception for our guests. I printed out a card that had "thank you" in several languges and signed by our family, which was handed out to each guest by Damion and Zen. They all LOVED the kids... who wouldn't. I am just sorry that I don't have any pictures of that day to share.
So, that was Wednesday, Thursday and Friday... not to downplay ANY of that, but my happiest moment was Saturday... I FINALLY got my tattoo- I have waited on it for a long time... BUT it was VERY worth it.
Jackie at 717 tattoo did a FABULOUS job with the VERY SPECIAL and PERSONAL tattoo- I am MORE than happy with it. I had gotten 2 other small ones a little earlier which mean alot as well... I have his signature, from one of his mother's day cards to me, by Rick's heart locket and a bird in the heavens by Rick's key from heaven. These are special to me as well.... BUT the one on my left thigh (Rick's is on the right) is SO special. I will post pictures.
Sunday I went to Weis to purchase items for our weekly family dinner - I was in such a great mood- like Jimmy was lifting me up- I sang as I shopped- I don't know why... I just know I felt very happy. As I was leaving the store, I looked at the 'crane game' by the exit door that Jimmy used to play EVERY TIME he left there- and when he won something, he would give ot to the next child he saw- some mothers looked at him like "hey, perv- my child cannot accept that"... he used to just laugh that off... what else could he do?! ANYHOW>..... I put my dollar in (like any other time I leave the store) thinking that I would have just wasted yet another dollar- well... try one... I came up empty - the second try on the dollar- I got a ballcap.... Jimmy was there with me!! :)
I kept the grandkids Sunday evening - and when we got up this morning we made special pancakes- I LOVE my time with them!! AND with the different shapes they expect me to make 'look' like their request keeps me on my toes... and again, I KNOW that Jimmy is so proud of what I am doing...
Thanks for reading and look for the posted pictures....
Love and hugs to all

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Well... today marks 3 months since I lost a VERY IMPORTANT part of my being, part of my soul, part of WHO I AM/WAS.

 I had a very beneficial Reiki with Suzanne again... I got to see Sarah as well today and that was just a fantastic bonus. These 2 WONDERFUL ladies helped us so much in the journey- we were so blessed to have had them on our side. NOTHING would be a big enough thank you to them both. Sarah, you stay safe in your upcoming journey!!

Jimmy is all around me, I know this...., I feel this, BUT it is still so hard for me to accept that he is not of Earthly stature any more. I have had such a hard time looking at his pictures for any length of time. I am getting better though... as I told Suz today.

Emily (my boss) lets me know that what Jimmy and I shared is so amazing and that we got to tell one another over and over just how the other felt is such a blessing- we sometimes don't do that enough and when someone gets taken away- we wish that we would have said so many things- thank God that Jimmy and I said them.... imagine not having that- Oh my God. I would be so much more devastated. So, when you are pissed off at Mom or Dad or even a sibling or significant other- just remember that they can be taken away in the blink of an eye- Jimmy and I were lucky enough for that hadn't happened to us. Love one another- look through the pettiness!!

The love continues.... Jimmy will be riding Niagara Falls in a barrel made by Jeff and carried out by Clare, A.K.A. "Jeff's Mom"- love you CLARE! It is so awesome that he had friends like this- friends that respected him and now his wishes to be spread out- Gotta love that Boy!!

And a big sorry to Carla- Lanfill's GIRLFRIEND- I wish that I would have READ the entire letter before posting- thank you for the wonderful words and the GREAT SCARF-

Much love to all.....

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

I had another amazing evening with Clare- thank you so much for all you do. It is nice to sit and talk about Jimmy with you. AND all of the other stuff we have in common- *wink wink* - Jimmy knows.... ha
I also want to thank Carla, Landfill's mother, for a very nice letter- I am truly sorry for your loss- I know that type of pain as well... yes, Jimmy has touched SOOOO many people over his short years here on this Earth- he was (and still is) a very important part of many people's lives. He has been an inspiration and a beacon for many- his family miss him so much and still recall all of the moments and lessons that he has taught. We get together every Sunday (friends invited) and enjoy the times shared and moments remembered - I hope that we can continue this for a VERY LONG TIME! Thursday will be 3 months and sometimes it feels just like yesterday that Jimmy and I were texting or talking on the phone- or I was rubbing his feet (he LOVED that) - or we just sat in silence and it was ok, because we each KNEW how the other felt... one of the texts that we sent one another had something along those lines of---- even if we don't speak- I feel you there- I know your presence- I know you care! He had commented that he felt so much better for me just BEING THERE- it eased his mind. And his words "ONLY my Mom can calm me- only she can talk me down from the edge" I will NEVER forget those words. It helps (even if a little) to know how much I meant to him- BUT probably NEVER as much as he meant to me.
Thank you Clare for your wonderful words- I hope to continue making Jimmy proud for a long time. I love to talk to Jeff about Jimmy- he was his best friend for a long time and to hear some of the stuff that Jimmy would say is nice- Thanks Jeff for only telling me the NICE stuff- ha
I will be hosting a "thank you" dessert social at GSV for all of the people who helped me in MANY ways during my journey with Jimmy- I am hoping that Jimmy sees this and smiles- because I think about our baking day last year- he was so intent on helping with the Christmas cookies- I will NEVER forget that either-
Much love to all